AKA "How to seduce a goth princess when you're an awful frog
or just a vampiric old varlet"
AKA "How to seduce a goth princess when you're an awful frog
or just a vampiric old varlet"
| Here are the naughty stats... | |
| Where do you live ? | |
| USA | 68 % |
| Europe | 8 % |
| Transylvania | 0 % |
| Asia | 0 % |
| Another planet | 0 % |
| Another dimension | 24 % |
| What's your age ? | |
| 15-20 | 36 % |
| 20-25 | 24 % |
| 25-35 | 32 % |
| 35-45 | 0 % |
| a grandma | 8 % |
| Are you a : | |
| typical goth | 8 % |
| perky goth | 8 % |
| pretentious goth | 0 % |
| gloomy goth | 8 % |
| miserable goth | 4 % |
| catty goth | 20 % |
| fatty goth | 0 % |
| Goth American Princess | 8 % |
| some other pain in the ass | 44 % |
| Which of these describes you best ? | |
| perfect | 20 % |
| perpetual virgin | 4 % |
| stuck up bitch | 20 % |
| village pump | 0 % |
| satanic slut | 20 % |
| cockteaser | 8 % |
| ice box | 12 % |
| property of Hell's Angels | 4 % |
| girl from Mars | 12 % |
| lousy lay | 0 % |
| another goddam dyke | 0 % |
| Do you prefer to be picked up by : | |
| a guy your age | 12 % |
| a younger guy | 44 % |
| an older guy | 28 % |
| a guy with plastic fangs | 4 % |
| a grrrll | 8 % |
| a 60 foot gorilla | 4 % |
| Which of these comes closest to your idea of the perfect male ? | |
| Edward Scissorhands | 32 % |
| Tim Burton | 16 % |
| Edgar Allan Poe | 16 % |
| Frank N. Furter | 16 % |
| Bela Lugosi | 4 % |
| Marilyn Manson | 4 % |
| Charles Manson | 8 % |
| Charles Ingalls | 0 % |
| Your dad | 0 % |
| Uncle Fester | 4 % |
| Sid Vicious | 8 % |
| Austin Powers | 4 % |
| Bill Clinton | 4 % |
| Varney | 8 % |
| Froggy | 8 % |
| Would your ideal date have : | |
| long hair | 60 % |
| very long hair | 12 % |
| hair extensions | 0 % |
| been called Cousin It | 4 % |
| a mohawk | 4 % |
| short hair | 12 % |
| no hair | 4 % |
| a fright wig | 4 % |
| Do you like a guy to have : | |
| no tattoos | 24 % |
| a tattoo | 28 % |
| a couple of tattoos | 40 % |
| lotsa tattoos | 4 % |
| hang in an art gallery | 8 % |
| Would you like your ideal date to : | |
| be skinny | 52 % |
| be very skinny | 20 % |
| contract a wasting disease | 16 % |
| contract a recording contract | 12 % |
| Do you like a guy to : | |
| have a piercing | 64 % |
| no piercings | 4 % |
| lotsa piercings | 16 % |
| clank when he walks | 8 % |
| set off airport alarms | 8 % |
| Do you prefer a guy who's : | |
| a good dancer | 16 % |
| a good talker | 24 % |
| a good listener | 28 % |
| creative | 36 % |
| psychotic | 44 % |
| a brainiac | 16 % |
| gay | 8 % |
| an unstoppable sex machine | 28 % |
| Do you prefer a guy who wears : | |
| black | 40 % |
| purple | 4 % |
| lilac | 0 % |
| a tie-dyed kaftan | 4 % |
| leather | 16 % |
| pvc | 12 % |
| your underwear | 4 % |
| out his welcome | 0 % |
| nothing | 24 % |
| Would you prefer a guy to give you : | |
| a cigarette | 16 % |
| chocolates | 12 % |
| flowers | 24 % |
| crack | 8 % |
| his latest album | 24 % |
| a hickey | 0 % |
| twins | 0 % |
| herpes | 4 % |
| an enema | 12 % |
| You could only ever kiss a guy who has : | |
| black lipstick | 32 % |
| a tongue stud | 24 % |
| a chin spike | 0 % |
| plastic fangs | 4 % |
| a gold tooth | 4 % |
| lotsa money | 12 % |
| bad breath | 8 % |
| a knife to your throat | 16 % |
| You prefer a guy who offers you : | |
| a drink | 36 % |
| a cigarette | 8 % |
| a pick-up line | 0 % |
| sweet talk | 16 % |
| dirty talk | 8 % |
| a syringe | 16 % |
| payment in cash | 20 % |
| What you most look for in a
relationship is : |
|
| love | 24 % |
| companionship | 4 % |
| shared interests | 20 % |
| a soft touch | 4 % |
| a slave | 36 % |
| toe-curling sex | 16 % |
| Do you prefer to be seduced : | |
| over dinner | 16 % |
| over a drink | 20 % |
| on the dance floor | 32 % |
| over a chair | 36 % |
| You meet a guy you like you go
with him back to : |
|
| his place | 16 % |
| your place | 8 % |
| meet his parents | 4 % |
| a motel | 0 % |
| a cemetery | 28 % |
| the psycho ward | 12 % |
| Hell | 8 % |
| Las Vegas | 0 % |
| a Disney movie | 16 % |
| Harlem | 12 % |
| You prefer to have sex with a guy : | |
| on the first date | 24 % |
| on the second date | 8 % |
| on the third date | 12 % |
| on the dance floor | 16 % |
| while you're being introduced | 20 % |
| not in a million years | 20 % |
| The kind of sex you like : | |
| straight | 24 % |
| BDSM | 12 % |
| illegal | 12 % |
| bestial | 8 % |
| new to this planet | 8 % |
| indescribable | 36 % |
| You only get down on your knees to : | |
| pray | 12 % |
| kiss a dwarf | 20 % |
| give head | 32 % |
| kiss ass | 4 % |
| look for a lost contact | 12 % |
| throw up | 16 % |
| support your president | 4 % |
| After sex you like to : | |
| smoke | 20 % |
| snuggle | 8 % |
| schmooze | 0 % |
| lie on the wet patch | 4 % |
| make gurgly noises | 4 % |
| make odious comparisons | 8 % |
| close the coffin lid | 16 % |
| clean your chainsaw | 16 % |
| reveal national secrets | 0 % |
| do it again | 24 % |
| If you let Varney seduce you, would he : | |
| find God | 4 % |
| stay awake | 8 % |
| feel the earth move | 20 % |
| cry with gratitude | 28 % |
| have an asthma attack | 24 % |
| feel a new man | 12 % |
| feel a new woman | 16 % |
| ask stupid questions | 16 % |
| show terrible horror videos | 12 % |
| suck your blood | 16 % |
| write you into a movie | 16 % |
| propose | 8 % |
| show you his comics | 16 % |
| run off with your mom | 20 % |
| If you let Froggy seduce you, would he : | |
| find spiritual fulfillment | 12 % |
| turn into a toad | 16 % |
| cum | 20 % |
| become a man | 12 % |
| promise to give up garlic | 12 % |
| talk about French cheeses | 8 % |
| wash | 20 % |
| stop hacking porn sites | 24 % |
| show terrible horror videos | 12 % |
| do Napoleon impressions | 16 % |
| dance the French can-can | 24 % |
| ask stupid questions | 16 % |
| take arty photos of you | 20 % |
| leave a tip | 20 % |
| cook his famous duck | 4 % |
| Did you think this form was : | |
| clever | 44 % |
| stupid | 4 % |
| pathetic | 12 % |
| thought-provoking | 16 % |
| sexist | 24 % |
| Thanks to those who filled the form ! | |
**wanna fill the naughty form ?**
| The Big Idea | | Who are we?
| | The Goth Princess we would love to seduce
|
| Ze Naughty grrrlz who tried to seduce us | | Past
Goth Princesses we tried to seduce | | Related and
other links |